


The World Gets Better

by Evie_adams273



Category: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Gay Panic, Gen, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Compliant, I decided to write some fluff, I love them both, Lily is a brilliant sister, M/M, Oblivious Albus, Post Cursed Child, Scorbus exist, attempting fluff, it won't get much nicer than this, little angsty, lots of gay panic, middle of the night, wrote this weeks ago
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-02-12 18:41:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21481039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evie_adams273/pseuds/Evie_adams273
Summary: Albus has a train of thought in the middle of the night, and his very gay panic begins to come to something.
Relationships: Albus Potter & Lily Luna Potter, Scorpius Malfoy & Lily Luna Potter, Scorpius Malfoy/Albus Severus Potter
Comments: 6
Kudos: 75





	The World Gets Better

**Author's Note:**

> Minor trigger warning: messed up sleeping patterns and a bit of anxiety

Albus drew his knees up to his chest, trying to force himself to breathe. If he remembered to breathe, he would make it through the night. If he made it through the night, he would make it through the morning. And if he made it through the morning, he could make it through to the next night.

And then, well he didn’t really know what he was trying to make it to.

He seemed to be existing solely on a promise to himself that, if he got through each section of the day, it would get better. Even though it never did. But he couldn’t give up any hope. He had to remain hopeful, because if he didn’t, he would lose.

He didn’t even care about losing the war in his mind. All he cared about was whether he lost Scorpius or not. He couldn’t lose Scorpius. He couldn’t lose Scorpius when he had somehow managed to fall head-over-heels in love with him.

He didn’t even know why he thought that he would lose Scorpius if he lost hope, but he didn’t want to risk it. It wasn’t worth it. And if keeping hope kept him afloat, in the loosest sense of the word, then he would cling to it.

He glanced over at his friend’s bed. He was asleep, the hangings cracked open so that the moonlight fell across his face. Albus didn’t understand how he slept with it, but he didn’t close the hangings. Scorpius had hated the dark with a burning passion since his return from Voldemort’s world. Albus wouldn’t even consider subjecting him to something that could remind him of that. And what’s more, he looked incredibly cute with his messy hair.

Albus smiled to himself. Sometimes, he allowed himself to hope that Scorpius might love him back. Or at least feel something back. Since Rose had rejected him in May, he had stopped pining after her. It had been something of a relief after about three years of it, though Albus didn’t comment on this.

He had done nothing to clue Scorpius into the fact that he was in love with him. It was a bit stupid really. Although it might not have been, because he genuinely didn’t know whether he was ready for Scorpius to know. He wanted him to, but every time he had come close to saying anything at all, he had panicked. Maybe that was just his tendency to panic.

_“So run me through this again,” Lily grins at him.  
_

_“Lily!” Albus moans. “You know what’s going on. Please don’t make me run through it _again_.”  
_

_“Okay,” Lily relents. “I do know. So, what are you going to do?”  
_

_“Keep it a secret and hope he never finds out?”   
_

_“Albus,” Lily scolds him. “You can’t ignore it.”  
_

_“I’m not. I’m just not telling him.”  
_

_“What’s the worst that could happen?”  
_

_“He could see it as a joke. He could stop being friends with me. He could stop being friends with me and then tell everyone else that I’m gay and then not step in when they attack me over it.”  
_

_“Please tell me that you remember that you have fallen in love with _Scorpius Malfoy_. The kindest person either of us have ever met. Scorpius Malfoy.”  
_

_“I know but–”  
_

_“Listen to me, Albus,” Lily says, a little softer now that she can see Albus is genuinely panicking. “He would never take it as a joke. He’s better than that. He knows when you’re being serious.”  
_

_“I guess…”  
_

_“He would never stop being your friend either,” Lily continues, “yes, it might be a little awkward for a while, but you won’t ever lose his friendship. And he would never, _ever_, spread rumours about anyone. He just wouldn’t. He’s Scorpius Malfoy.”  
_

_“I know,” Albus nods, smiling at her. “I should go. Things to do.”  
_

_“Have a nice night,” Lily says. “And try to get some sleep.”_

Albus breathed out slowly as he realised that he had been holding the air for about half a minute. Maybe he should try to sleep. That would be the healthiest option for him. He’d wake up in time to eat breakfast. He wouldn’t fall asleep in first lesson.

Maybe he could try sleep again. He had shut it out as an option a while ago, but maybe now was the time to try again.

He lay down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. Deep breath in, eyes closed, long breath out. Deep breath in, roll onto his side (so that he was still facing Scorpius), long breath out. Deep breath in, let sleep take him, long breath–

There was a flash of green across his mind and he opened his eyes suddenly, barely remembering to cling to the idea of breathing.

Okay.

Okay.

He didn’t need to close his eyes. Maybe if he concentrated on breathing alone, he would fall asleep naturally.

Deep breath in. Long breath out. Deep breath in. Long breath out. Deep breath in. Long breath out.

“Hey.”

Albus looked up sharply to see Scorpius smiling at him, watching him from between the hangings.

“Hey,” Albus smiled back. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Are you? You don’t look like you’re sleeping.”

“I’m not,” Albus admitted. “I tried. It didn’t – happen.”

“Can I come over?”

“Yeah,” Albus nodded. “Why?”

“I wanted to talk to you. We’re alone and I don’t really feel like sleeping either.”

Albus nodded again, sitting up as Scorpius padded over to him and settled on the bed beside him. Albus felt his heart skip a beat as Scorpius wrapped his arms around him, squeezing him reassuringly. 

“You sure you’re okay?” he smiled at Scorpius.

“Yeah,” Scorpius nodded. “I guess – I don’t know. No. That’s a lie. I do know.”

“Hey, no judgements,” Albus said softly. “I’ll listen. Don’t worry.”

No judgements. That had been a promise they had both made not long after returning from their experience. No matter what the other was going through, they would get through it together, because they could be honest. They could be honest with one another.

Albus tried to be, in all situations apart from that of his love life. If you could call it that. Apart from his overwhelming, head-over-heels love for Scorpius, he was completely honest. Apart from that. 

“I was talking to Lily,” Scorpius continued quietly, “about something.”

“Okay,” Albus nodded. “Are you okay?”

“Nervous,” Scorpius said. “No. No. I’m going to say this. I’m going to actually say this.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

“Then I’ll listen.”

Scorpius took a deep breath, letting go of Albus and sitting up properly. Albus sat beside him, trying to offer him a reassuring smile.

“I was talking to Lily about you,” Scorpius continued quietly. “And she said that you’d already talked to her about the same thing, so I should talk to you.”

“About what?” Albus couldn’t help but ask.

His heart had started to pound as he realised what might be about to happen. There was the possibility that Scorpius knew what was going on. And if he did, if he did, then Albus couldn’t help but feel a sense of impending doom building in his chest.

“Over summer, I missed you. I missed you so much. I tried a couple of times to get to dad to arrange something so I could see you, but we’re still patchy as a concept and I thought it was best just to focus my energy on that rather than try and bring in something else.

“But I saw you on the platform before school and it just started to register that you’re the best person I know, and I don’t want to be friends anymore.”

“You – you don’t want to be friends anymore?” Albus felt his eyes filling with tears.

“Because every time I look at you, I fall more and more in love with you,” Scorpius placed his hands on Albus’ cheeks, wiping away his tears. “And I don’t know what to do with that.”

“I do.”

And Albus leaned in and kissed him, trying to ignore the doubt that this was the right thing to do. If this wasn’t what Scorpius had been implying, he had just royally fucked up.

But Scorpius kissed him back, and neither of them stopped.

Albus couldn’t help but feel that this was the best feeling in the world. The feeling of being entirely in love with someone who loved him back just as much. The feeling of kissing him and knowing that, no matter what had happened, he was still loved and he could still love, was better than anything he had ever felt.

It wasn’t just a little crush. It wasn’t just a mildly more intense feeling for his friend. It was truly the feeling of being in love, because he was in love, and he was allowed to be in love.

He smiled widely at Scorpius as they finished kissing, before wrapping his arms around him again and breathing in deeply.

“I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Scorpius lay back on the bed, taking Albus with him, and Albus laughed softly. 

“Stay here?” he murmured. 

“Will you sleep?”

“I’ll try. And it’ll be easier with you.”

“Then, of course I’ll stay,” Scorpius smiled.

Albus smiled back at him, pulling the duvet over the both of them without ending his hug with Scorpius. They curled up together and Albus ran a hand through Scorpius’ hair, breathing in deeply. He could sleep. He could sleep like this. In terms of feeling safe, this was the safest he would ever feel.

“I love you,” he murmured again, closing his eyes.

“Shhh. Get some sleep.”

“We should thank Lily. In the morning.”

Scorpius laughed softly and Albus smiled. Lily would probably tell them they had both been incredibly oblivious. They probably had been. He smiled again.

And within a few moments, he was asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this for @SunshineScorpius a couple of weeks ago when I said I'd regularly send her fluff while she was at work, but then realised I didn't have enough fluff to send her, so I started to write this. Hope you enjoyed it.   
Thanks for reading  
Kudos and comments much appreciated  
Twitter @evieadams273


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